Want

Today I haven't been feeling quite myself and I apologize to anyone affected by that. Especially my best friends who can tell that there was something wrong. I've realized what the problem is though. The overwhelming problem is the need to be wanted.

More than anything else I want to be wanted. It's a feeling I haven't felt in 8 months. I'm great friends with several girls, but that's all I ever seem to become. I have a horrible tendency to get caught up in the friend zone. I can't discount how much my friends mean to me because they mean the world to be, but there is something about human nature where a person wants to be wanted as more than that. That's where I'm at right now. People say you don't need a girlfriend or boyfriend and I agree, but there is something about being wanted as more than a friend I think we all seek.

Anytime I start talking to anyone I think it's going great and it ends up losing steam and I'm in the friend zone once again.

Ty has a girl who wants him in his life now and the change in him is incredible. He seems more confident and just happier. I love seeing it in him and I can honestly say I miss that feeling. Jared is in the midst of something similar to Ty and he seems to be extremely happy with what he has. I'm happy for both of them.

I just want to feel wanted again. But for now I'll be alright.

NP: Chasing Cars- Snow Patrol