The Grand Scheme

Today I researched blogging for my senior project and I am so excited with what I've found. There are ways to make money blogging which I knew, but somehow I can make money even on blogger! I'm gonna look into that especially since I'm hanging up the busboy apparel during baseball season. Supplemental income from my blog would really help and I'm excited to see what I can make of it.

Speaking of baseball I promised some people a shout out in a blog so here it is. Baseball this year is going to depend a lot on senior leadership. I envision 6 of the 9 starters will be seniors. I think the other 3 positions will be filled by juniors. Between Shea, Larue, and AC I think we can have a pretty solid squad. I'm not sure where exactly AC and Larue will play but I can definitely see them cracking the starting lineup. They'll have to put in work, but if they're willing to bust their asses we can put together a winning team. I just hope they know it won't come easy.

I've just been feeling inspired today for many reasons.

Reason 1:
I had an awesome night last night with my friends. We sat in my basement and talked about serial killers and Columbine for a long time and we went to McDonald's and ate at like 2 a.m. We come up with the most absurd scenarios for things and I love it.

Reason 2:
I'm really realizing what's worth fighting for. Today I was basically told to stop fighting. I'm okay with that because it had consumed so much of my being that I couldn't focus on other things that needed my attention. I've said it before and I'll say it again; I will always fight for what I believe in, but the day that what I believe in or want no longer wants me to fight...that's the day I'll hang up the gloves.

Reason 3:
People around me are starting to realize what they deserve. Someone I care about a lot made a decision last night to get out of a situation that was potentially going to hurt them later on. They realized that the person they were talking to hadn't changed at all and was still the same dishonest, not nice person as months before.

While I have those reasons and many more I have a rant I need to go one right now so here goes.

This world is full of people. Good people, bad people, misunderstood people. Pretty people, ugly people, and average looking people. I will never judge a person on how they look. I will judge them based on their actions. Even through actions our judgement may be skewed, and until we truly know someone's story we can't begin to fully understand them. I blogged days ago about a twitter fight with an aspiring rapper. I said mean things as did he and neither of us really know the other. Sure it happens all the time, the name calling, the shit talking. But in the end he and I aren't that different. We both have lofty dreams and aspirations and we're both working on achieving them. Sure right now I don't like his music, but hopefully one day I can put on my headphones listen to a song of his and know that I was the motivation he needed to keep going. And I hope one day he can walk into a Barnes and Noble and buy a book, see my name on the front cover and have a little laugh at the petty fight we had some years back.

The other thing that has been bugging me is how easily people throw things away. The same person I mentioned before was seemingly thrown away. They were thrown away by a person who didn't realize what they had in front of them. People can be so blind to what they have standing in front of them that it makes me sick. I know I'd never throw something like that away.

Another thought for you all. How can some people be so mentally deranged that they find pleasure in making others feel worthless. What satisfaction comes along with that? Especially when you're putting someone down who you have already wronged and who shouldn't even be giving you a second chance. By definition that person is insane for thinking that doing the same thing over and over again will result in something different. Call it naive or call it stupid, it is what it is. People like to have faith in other people. There's no shame in that. No shame at all.

The real shame is when you're given a second chance and you don't take advantage of it. If someone puts their heart out there for you and gives you the key you have the option to take it and use it properly. To show that person how much they mean to you and that they're the one for you. Or you can take they key and toy with the lock. You can emotionally drain the person and degrade them to feel like they weren't enough. When someone hands you the key, use it the right way.

Final thing i swear.

Don't ever be somebody's back up plan. Waiting for someone to make you their priority is a terrible terrible thing to do. If you aren't their first choice, move along until you find someone who has you as their priority. Patience may be a virtue, but settling for being someones fallback is anything but virtuous. Be someone's priority today. 


NP: If It Means a Lot to You- ADTR