same old tune

That's what it is I guess. Day in and day out I worry about the same things. My leg shakes for the same people. I stay up at night worrying. For what? For nothing. Worrying and shaking does me no good. Same old tune, right? Now comes the part where I tell you that's how I'm wired and how I'm afraid to lose people because of my Dad. Same old tune. You've heard it a million times. I guess I'm becoming a bit predictable. Predictable, too caring, compulsive worrier, good guy. Can't figure out what my worst crime is thus far in life. Call it same old tune if you must but I'm shaking right now. It's not a usual shake, it's more violent and it's one where I feel like I'm slowly losing control. It's one of those shaking fits where my leg shakes, my eyes water, my heart races, my blood pressure rises, my fists clench, and I feel like I'm going to hurt someone. I'm an emotional wreck. But if you look into that people who are emotional wrecks don't have to be that way. They don't have to be wrecked. Something has to wreck them first. Same old tune.

"Go ahead and tell them how you'll never regret anything or how you think it isn't possible to care too much." -yes that's me saying what I just thought to myself.

It's scary when you start calling yourself out, scary when you doubt yourself, scary when you realize everyone was right. Scary when you start to regret.

Same old tune.

not anymore.

But when I wake up tomorrow, it'll all repeat itself. History repeats itself and by tomorrow morning tonight will be history.

History needs to be rewritten. It needs changed.

Blogs like this make me wonder, am I insane? Or is it just everyone else?