First and foremost is the realization that I've been blessed with an overwhelmingly supportive and loving family. If their support wasn't obvious in weekly trips to the grocery store maybe it is even more exaggerated in repeated "good luck on finals" texts in the family group message. Or maybe I have the best family because they show up in State College to watch me play after I tell them countless times not to bother. I think it's apparent that I've been given one of the greatest gifts in life: a family who wants nothing more than for me to succeed and be there to see it happen.
The second realization is something I've been reluctant to admit, and that's the fact that I'm a fairly lucky person. For the longest time I said I didn't believe in luck, but I don't think I can say I firmly believe that's the case anymore. How could I have so much good in my life if I weren't, to some degree or another, a lucky person? Maybe it's true that to a certain point you make your own luck. I don't think I could make this much luck in this life of mine. I've been afforded so many great opportunities while in college and can't pretend that there isn't some hint of luck involved. I'm not necessarily talking about luck in a "hit the lottery" type of sense, but more like having such a loving family and incomparable friends. If there is some greater force at work I'm grateful to him or her or it.
Friends are the third realization I've had. It's not that I was unaware of how good I had it, but sometimes it takes a memorable trip to remind me just how special a bond I have with so many people. I've been "lucky" to not only keep my best friends from high school but to also make a new group of friends in college. Whether it's a group of them in the Bronx, in Oakland, or even in Charlottesville I can't help but smile when I think about the number of people who have had an impact on my life since I started college. I don't know what I did to deserve such a great group of people who take me in and love me, but whatever it is I hope it never fades away. The defining moment of our most recent trip to Charlottesville came at the tail end of the trip. It was a moment that showed me how powerful friendships and genuine laughs can be. We had just got milkshakes and prepared to drop Amanda and her roommate Kara off at the apartment before heading home. As we said our goodbyes Kara started to tear up. At first she seemed to be doing it jokingly, but after a minute or so she was full on crying. Now Kara has only met our group of friends a few times, which made her crying even more surprising. Her crying made my day and broke my heart. It made me sad that we had to leave, but it showed me that even though our group of friends is seemingly just a group of potty mouthed jagoffs, we have the ability to sincerely connect with people. I guess amidst all our dysfunction is an immeasurable level of genuine caring. We bicker a lot, we might even full on fight, but at the end of the day we give a damn about each other and the world at large. And honestly I'm not sure you can say that about everyone you'll meet.
I doubt I deserve everything that I've come into in my three years of college, but I'm not about to complain. This luck is my luck. I've made some of it, and I've been gifted some of it. I'm aware that there are people out there who don't have what I do. I wish they did, though.
Everyone deserves those friendships that make the complexities and difficulties of life seen much less daunting. The type of friends you truly feel alive with. The ones you'd kill for and die for. I have that, and I'm eternally thankful for it.
I guess these three points aren't so much conclusions or realizations as they are acknowledgments, but I still felt the need to get them out there. I don't write all that often anymore, but after this weekend I felt it was necessary to express how blessed I feel.
NP: Bright - Echosmith
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