Next year will be my freshman year in college and I plan on spending most of my time in New York...but when I'm not in New York I want to travel. I have six best friends I need to visit in four different cities. Those four cities are in three different states. PA, OH, and VA.
Aside from going to visit those best friends I deeply hope that they'll come and visit me too. I have other friends I hope will visit as well. I know a lot of people that have never been to New York City and I hope to show them what it's all about.
I want to travel around a lot. Not only next year, but for the rest of my life. Supposedly the world is a big place, but I've never crossed the Mississippi River. Chicago is supposed to be great. California seems to shallow for me, maybe I'll check out San Francisco though.
All of Europe appeals to me and maybe one day I'll have as much money as Pap and be able to make it to Africa and Asia as well.
That's the dream at least.
Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Sunday, July 29, 2012
fireside religion
Last night at the campfire Ty and I talked about religion for a long while. Ty and I have different views on religion, but we do agree on certain things.We came to agree that we can't believe in heaven and hell more than we do something like reincarnation. How can I believe in something that nobody has ever seen? Sure some of you smart asses will say, "But you believe in the wind, don't you?" And to that I raise the middle finger.
I think heaven and hell was created as a form of control. If you preach to people that doing bad will send them to the fiery depths of hell then obviously they will second guess doing wrong. If you're promised a wonderful time in heaven, wouldn't you expect people to act better? No matter what heaven and hell is about, it works...to a point. I don't mind if it was a form of control or not, if it persuades more people to do good then it works for me.
What I thought of about life after death is this...
What if, after we die our mind creates an eternity for us based on what we believe? What I'm saying is that when we die, our body stops working and we are no longer alive, but our mind has already created a dreamlike eternity based upon our beliefs. If you believe in a heaven where you'll see your loved ones again, then that's what you get. If you believe in a commonplace life much like this one, then you can live in that. I guess it's a form of "limbo" like they mention in the movie Inception. Maybe it's a never-ending dream of sorts created by your subconscious. I'm not saying you actually dream because, duh your brain is dead. I'm talking about a dream like state created by your mind, a place where your soul or being passes into after death. I like to think that's the way it works. I just cannot bring myself to blindly believe in heaven and hell. Everybody is entitled to believe in what they want, and I encourage you all to do that. What works for me might not work for you and vice versa. To each their own, I guess.
The other thing we agree upon is that the saying, "God always has a plan," isn't true. We just can't believe this is the case after things like the Holocaust, the Aurora shooting, or any other senseless violence. God doesn't plan out each and every person's existence. He doesn't have a specific date you are going to die. Explain to me why God would want an eight year old boy to die of cancer? You can't. God might have created the earth and the existence of everything here on earth, but he hasn't planned it all out. He put us here and we have our resources, from their it is out of his hands. Now, does he intervene? Maybe...I can't tell you that for sure. What I can tell you is that I don't believe God has a plan for everybody. Sure everybody has a chance to do something with their life, but if you try to convince me that God planned on my grandpa majoring in accounting in college I will punch you in the face. If that's the case please explain to me why God planned on Hitler murdering millions of people? Yeah, thought so.
Our talk about religion made me realize that in this life, we really don't know anything for certain.
NP: Both of Us- B.o.B ft. Taylor Swift
I think heaven and hell was created as a form of control. If you preach to people that doing bad will send them to the fiery depths of hell then obviously they will second guess doing wrong. If you're promised a wonderful time in heaven, wouldn't you expect people to act better? No matter what heaven and hell is about, it works...to a point. I don't mind if it was a form of control or not, if it persuades more people to do good then it works for me.
What I thought of about life after death is this...
What if, after we die our mind creates an eternity for us based on what we believe? What I'm saying is that when we die, our body stops working and we are no longer alive, but our mind has already created a dreamlike eternity based upon our beliefs. If you believe in a heaven where you'll see your loved ones again, then that's what you get. If you believe in a commonplace life much like this one, then you can live in that. I guess it's a form of "limbo" like they mention in the movie Inception. Maybe it's a never-ending dream of sorts created by your subconscious. I'm not saying you actually dream because, duh your brain is dead. I'm talking about a dream like state created by your mind, a place where your soul or being passes into after death. I like to think that's the way it works. I just cannot bring myself to blindly believe in heaven and hell. Everybody is entitled to believe in what they want, and I encourage you all to do that. What works for me might not work for you and vice versa. To each their own, I guess.
The other thing we agree upon is that the saying, "God always has a plan," isn't true. We just can't believe this is the case after things like the Holocaust, the Aurora shooting, or any other senseless violence. God doesn't plan out each and every person's existence. He doesn't have a specific date you are going to die. Explain to me why God would want an eight year old boy to die of cancer? You can't. God might have created the earth and the existence of everything here on earth, but he hasn't planned it all out. He put us here and we have our resources, from their it is out of his hands. Now, does he intervene? Maybe...I can't tell you that for sure. What I can tell you is that I don't believe God has a plan for everybody. Sure everybody has a chance to do something with their life, but if you try to convince me that God planned on my grandpa majoring in accounting in college I will punch you in the face. If that's the case please explain to me why God planned on Hitler murdering millions of people? Yeah, thought so.
Our talk about religion made me realize that in this life, we really don't know anything for certain.
NP: Both of Us- B.o.B ft. Taylor Swift
My Weekend
This weekend was a great getaway, a great adventure, and a great realization.
The getaway started with a spur of the moment decision to head to the cabin. Ty, Dad, and I set out on Friday for the cabin. Two hours later we were there and ready to go. I'm not sure what exactly I was getting away from back home, but I felt like I needed to get away. The cabin has always been a place where I could do that. Life at the cabin is so carefree that you forget about things going on at home. It's only two hours away, but that little cabin on the Allegheny River might as well be a thousand miles away. I'm not bothered by anything while I'm up there.
Ty, Chris, and I had a real adventure on Saturday. We woke up and set out to find "Baldy". Baldy is a rock that overlooks the river. The rock has about a two hundred foot drop down through the trees. The three of us searched for three hours before we realized that my Dad's directions had led us astray. We doubled back to the cabin and our neighbor Flo said she would take us up to it. Twenty minutes later I had a complete view of the river and the mountains across the river. It's views like that one that make you step back and realize how beautiful life is. After taking in that special view Flo asked us if we wanted to go inside Baldy's cave. I'm no cave explorer but I figured what the hell? It looked like only Flat Stanley could get through cave's opening but Flo showed us how to wiggle our way inside. The inside of the cave was spectacular. A hallway led deep down below and there was one room on each side of the hallway. Breathtaking is the closet I can come to describing that trip.
The realization came last night around the fire. Chris had left to go back home after dinner so it was my Dad, his step dad, Ty, and myself sitting around the fire. We talked about random things and somehow drugs came up. Listening to my Dad and Pappy talk about drugs was surreal. Pappy has experienced nearly every drug and his stories are just strange. Funny, but strange. I realized after Pappy and Dad left the fire exactly where I've come from. I come from a long line of smokers, drinkers, and addicts. I have roots in that cabin. A cabin where vulgarity, dysfunction, and delinquency are the three main attributes. The vulgarity doesn't define my family though. Neither does the delinquency or the history of addiction. More than anything the cabin and my family represent a long line of hard workers, lovers, and people who like to have a good time. The cabin has been an escape for my family for decades and will continue to be for years to come. My family has molded me into the person I am today.
I am my father's son. I am my grandmother's grandson. I am a product of the cabin. I am not a drinker, smoker, addict, or a delinquent. But I'm still a Forse.
Through my family's examples and their misfortunes I have become the young man I am today.
I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world.
NP: The Reason- Hoobastank
The getaway started with a spur of the moment decision to head to the cabin. Ty, Dad, and I set out on Friday for the cabin. Two hours later we were there and ready to go. I'm not sure what exactly I was getting away from back home, but I felt like I needed to get away. The cabin has always been a place where I could do that. Life at the cabin is so carefree that you forget about things going on at home. It's only two hours away, but that little cabin on the Allegheny River might as well be a thousand miles away. I'm not bothered by anything while I'm up there.
Ty, Chris, and I had a real adventure on Saturday. We woke up and set out to find "Baldy". Baldy is a rock that overlooks the river. The rock has about a two hundred foot drop down through the trees. The three of us searched for three hours before we realized that my Dad's directions had led us astray. We doubled back to the cabin and our neighbor Flo said she would take us up to it. Twenty minutes later I had a complete view of the river and the mountains across the river. It's views like that one that make you step back and realize how beautiful life is. After taking in that special view Flo asked us if we wanted to go inside Baldy's cave. I'm no cave explorer but I figured what the hell? It looked like only Flat Stanley could get through cave's opening but Flo showed us how to wiggle our way inside. The inside of the cave was spectacular. A hallway led deep down below and there was one room on each side of the hallway. Breathtaking is the closet I can come to describing that trip.
The realization came last night around the fire. Chris had left to go back home after dinner so it was my Dad, his step dad, Ty, and myself sitting around the fire. We talked about random things and somehow drugs came up. Listening to my Dad and Pappy talk about drugs was surreal. Pappy has experienced nearly every drug and his stories are just strange. Funny, but strange. I realized after Pappy and Dad left the fire exactly where I've come from. I come from a long line of smokers, drinkers, and addicts. I have roots in that cabin. A cabin where vulgarity, dysfunction, and delinquency are the three main attributes. The vulgarity doesn't define my family though. Neither does the delinquency or the history of addiction. More than anything the cabin and my family represent a long line of hard workers, lovers, and people who like to have a good time. The cabin has been an escape for my family for decades and will continue to be for years to come. My family has molded me into the person I am today.
I am my father's son. I am my grandmother's grandson. I am a product of the cabin. I am not a drinker, smoker, addict, or a delinquent. But I'm still a Forse.
Through my family's examples and their misfortunes I have become the young man I am today.
I wouldn't trade them for anything in the world.
NP: The Reason- Hoobastank
Thursday, July 26, 2012
trust
We've all asked somebody the question "Can I trust you?" I've done a lot of thinking lately and that question is one of the most pointless out there.
By the time we ask that to someone we've already made up our mind whether or not we trust them. It's almost rhetorical if you don't trust them because you know they're going to say yes. If we do trust them then they're only reaffirming our trust which isn't needed because they're always going to say yes.
Now when it comes time to tell them whatever your pressing issue is the trust again comes into play. If it is actually some huge secret then several things can happen. If you don't trust them then you will decide to not tell them anything, you will tell them a partial truth, or you will tell them a different secret that is much less serious or it might not even be a secret. In some rare cases you tell the untrustworthy person your secret hoping he or she spills it. Only in very particular cases does that happen.
If you trust the person and you ask them if you can trust them you have already made up your mind that you're sharing your secret. An untrustworthy person would lie to you and say you can trust them. Therefore you better pray that your initial judgement was right.
Trust is something earned. It isn't something you gain through a simple question.
Just a thought.
By the time we ask that to someone we've already made up our mind whether or not we trust them. It's almost rhetorical if you don't trust them because you know they're going to say yes. If we do trust them then they're only reaffirming our trust which isn't needed because they're always going to say yes.
Now when it comes time to tell them whatever your pressing issue is the trust again comes into play. If it is actually some huge secret then several things can happen. If you don't trust them then you will decide to not tell them anything, you will tell them a partial truth, or you will tell them a different secret that is much less serious or it might not even be a secret. In some rare cases you tell the untrustworthy person your secret hoping he or she spills it. Only in very particular cases does that happen.
If you trust the person and you ask them if you can trust them you have already made up your mind that you're sharing your secret. An untrustworthy person would lie to you and say you can trust them. Therefore you better pray that your initial judgement was right.
Trust is something earned. It isn't something you gain through a simple question.
Just a thought.
NYC
In exactly one month I'll be asleep at my aunts house awaiting for my move in day at Fordham.
Surreal.
It's exciting and at the same time scary.
I'm excited to be going to my dream school in my favorite city, but something has me feeling overwhelmed.
I'm not sure if it's the fact that I'll be in a city of over eight million where I only know three people. Being one of eight million makes a person feel so small, so outnumbered.
Or it might be the fact that unlike almost everyone I graduated with, I'm not going to college with anyone I know.
I'm sure I'll make friends soon enough I'm just uncertain.
Uncertain as to whether I'm going to try and walk on to the baseball team or if I should just settle with intramural sports.
Uncertain as to if I want to stay majoring in accounting or switch my major.
I don't know why I feel so overwhelmed, but I do.
I also feel like I have unfinished business at home that I need to take care of. I'm not sure if it's with friends or family, I just feel like there is something that needs to be closed. Some loose ends that I need to be tied up.
Maybe this is all just a lack of sleep getting to me. Maybe I have legitimate concerns. Maybe, maybe, maybe. They'll drive you crazy those maybes will.
NP: Closing Time-Semisonic
Surreal.
It's exciting and at the same time scary.
I'm excited to be going to my dream school in my favorite city, but something has me feeling overwhelmed.
I'm not sure if it's the fact that I'll be in a city of over eight million where I only know three people. Being one of eight million makes a person feel so small, so outnumbered.
Or it might be the fact that unlike almost everyone I graduated with, I'm not going to college with anyone I know.
I'm sure I'll make friends soon enough I'm just uncertain.
Uncertain as to whether I'm going to try and walk on to the baseball team or if I should just settle with intramural sports.
Uncertain as to if I want to stay majoring in accounting or switch my major.
I don't know why I feel so overwhelmed, but I do.
I also feel like I have unfinished business at home that I need to take care of. I'm not sure if it's with friends or family, I just feel like there is something that needs to be closed. Some loose ends that I need to be tied up.
Maybe this is all just a lack of sleep getting to me. Maybe I have legitimate concerns. Maybe, maybe, maybe. They'll drive you crazy those maybes will.
NP: Closing Time-Semisonic
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
ability to hate
Just like the ability to love we all have the ability to hate. Some people hate others a lot easier than others. Some people can truly say they don't hate anybody. Hell, some people can't find anyone they don't hate.
In my own semi-professional opinion it is a thousand times easier to hate someone than it is to not.
People always ask, 'Oh my don't you hate him or her for what they did to you?'
I don't.
I can truly say that I hate very few people. I think that in a way hating a lot of people makes you weak. Hating is so easy. Loving is a lot harder to do.
I hate people who do wrong to my family and friends, but other than that I don't know that I hate anyone.
In my opinion it is also, from time to time, easier to hate yourself than others. This might only be true for me, but sometimes I really get down on myself. I think it's because I expect more out of myself than I do others, so when I let myself down it hurts worse than when I'm let down by another. I am a perfectionist of sorts when it comes to my actions and as I've previously stated I'll never be perfect.
Don't ever hate yourself. Hating yourself is a weak thing to do. Loving yourself makes you a much stronger person. That is, as long as you don't idolize yourself.
In my own semi-professional opinion it is a thousand times easier to hate someone than it is to not.
People always ask, 'Oh my don't you hate him or her for what they did to you?'
I don't.
I can truly say that I hate very few people. I think that in a way hating a lot of people makes you weak. Hating is so easy. Loving is a lot harder to do.
I hate people who do wrong to my family and friends, but other than that I don't know that I hate anyone.
In my opinion it is also, from time to time, easier to hate yourself than others. This might only be true for me, but sometimes I really get down on myself. I think it's because I expect more out of myself than I do others, so when I let myself down it hurts worse than when I'm let down by another. I am a perfectionist of sorts when it comes to my actions and as I've previously stated I'll never be perfect.
Don't ever hate yourself. Hating yourself is a weak thing to do. Loving yourself makes you a much stronger person. That is, as long as you don't idolize yourself.
The Beach
The two purest forms of innocence are children and elderly people. And this innocence is multiplied when at the beach. The beach is a place a lot like Disney world. It doesn't matter where you're from or how much money you have, the beach is an experience unlike any other. When a person feels waves crash over them they can't help but think about the fact that creatures like those from Jaws are lurking only miles away. There is also an innocence about beach activities like building a sand castle. Young kids dig moats as deep as they can hoping that the night's tides won't break down their fortress. But the next morning they are dismayed to find that mother nature has come out on top. That doesn't prevent them from trying again though.
I saw an elderly couple in the water today that just melted my heart. This couple was jumping over waves and riding them in to shore. There was so much innocent love and fun between the two of them. It showed me that even though their younger years are gone, their youthfulness isn't and that even if the body grows old, the spirit doesn't have to.
Maybe it just takes a trip to the beach.
NP: Bohemian Rhapsody- Queen
I saw an elderly couple in the water today that just melted my heart. This couple was jumping over waves and riding them in to shore. There was so much innocent love and fun between the two of them. It showed me that even though their younger years are gone, their youthfulness isn't and that even if the body grows old, the spirit doesn't have to.
Maybe it just takes a trip to the beach.
NP: Bohemian Rhapsody- Queen
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